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Her, ‘Babe, I think I want to get a vibrator.’
Him, ‘Uhm, no way! You’re going to cheat on me.’
Her, ‘Why would you even say that???’

Right. Now. What IS GOING ON?

After talking to a few men, it appears they have a fear, that if a woman uses a dildo or vibrator, and it satisfies her more than her man can, they are going to start wondering about finding a partner who can do a better job. Sounds crazy? Turns out it’s not. This actually boils down to men’s insecurities. They fear that their partner is going to get attached to it more than she is to him, or better still, may cause her to seek pleasure in another man’s bed.

Ahhh the male ego. He who is responsible for all Thy orgasms. Watching your partner climax faster with a toy than with you must really take a hit.🥵

‘Tracy, are you telling me, my man is jealous of an inanimate object?”
“I sure am.”
Jealousy is a very normal, if not entirely healthy, emotion when it comes to love and sex. But getting jealous of your partner climaxing faster with a toy than with you, isn’t the best way to judge the quality of your sex life.
Lovemaking for longer periods of time with your partner is something that she will remember and enjoy the most, opposed to a quick, 3 minute vibrator session. In this case, it’s more the journey that is the most enjoyable, than the destination.

But why is my partner even getting jealous about a vibrator?

It is innate for a man to base his worth on his penis and performance. The size, the shape and ability to stay erect, all tally, making the man’s self-worth as the be-all, end-all of his size and performance. So, if a man believes that he is inadequate at bringing his woman to climax, after watching her get off so quickly with a vibrator, then he must be inadequate at the task of sex as a whole. The point is, despite what men think, women don’t use toys as a substitute for the good old chain and balls. Most women actually want to use the toys with their partners as a tool to enhance intimacy. However, they are hesitant as they do not know how to approach the subject without the whole insecurity ordeal. On the other hand, there are men who don’t feel threatened by vibrators, and actually, encourage its use. They even claim they find it arousing to watch.

My advice is, if your lady starts overusing her toy during your lovemaking, you need to communicate your concerns with her in a calm and mature way and reiterate the fact that you have sincere desire to protect your sexual bond with her. For an interesting read on this topic, I suggest a recent novel by Chuck Palahniuk who imagined a future in which “a billion husbands” are replaced by a wildly effective vibrator.

For more myths and interesting reads, make sure you’re following Totally Me Tracy on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.💜